E1
Square One
Even though he specifically asked them not to fix him up, Nicole and Carl do just that, and hit him with a surprise blind date at the restaurant Nicole runs, Nicole's. The lucky woman, Cindy Pruitt, gets herself so choked up over hearing about the death of Ben's wife of 18 years, Sarah, that she runs off mid-date in tears -- which is fine with Ben. He comes home to witness Matty kissing his lab partner, Paige, without either of them seeing him. So he pretends like he saw nothing, and tries to get Matty to admit to him what happened, to no avail. Nicole goes down to Ben's publishing company, the Home Court Press, to apologize for the bad date, but when she and Alex each want to fix him up again, Ben asks them to lay off, because he wants to find someone himself. Like, perhaps Elizabeth who works upstairs. Ben has no idea how to ask her out, but he finds himself one step closer when her elevator gets off at his stop. Ben nervously prepares for his first date in 20 years, wondering what t
E2
Basketball Jones
Ben and Alex wait at Nicole's to close an autobiography deal with basketball superstar Will Jones -- which makes Ben testy when the guy fails to show up on time, interfering with his plans to coach Matty's basketball team. Ben tries to bail on the dinner, but Alex and Nicole both force him to stay long enough for Will to arrive. After Ben tells Mr. Jones why he can't stay, Will asks Alex to reschedule; he wants to watch the game. Matty's team, the Home Court Pressers, are on a losing streak, no thanks to Matty's chubby friend, Weitzman. Ben agrees to let Will deliver their half-time pep talk -- unaware that he's going to give them a vitriolic ""You suck, losers"" speech. After Will breaks Ben's clipboard, announces that he's a bad coach, and sends the kids back on the court, an infuriated Ben blasts him for ruining the team's self-esteem, since he had spent all season boasting that losers always win. But Will's speech pushes the kids to their very first win, and Ben feels useless when th
E3
Flirting with Disaster
Carl introduces the family to his new girlfriend, Jeanette, who's a professional cellist. Ben enjoys her company, since she's not only a musician, which he wanted to be, but an aspiring writer, as well. Alex and Nicole, who came over to watch a Bears game, pull Ben aside long enough to alert him to the fact that he's flirting with Carl's girlfriend right in front of Carl. Which isn't a first for him. Ben swears his actions are innocent, but he's shocked the next day at work when Alex tells him that Jeanette was flirting back. Ben's revelation isn't helped by Carl asking him for a favor -- look at Jeanette's book. Fearing Alex was right, Ben refuses to at first, but eventually caves. Jeanette goes to Ben's office to see what he thought of her book. While he's trying to state his opinion, she gets shamefully close to him, cracks up over something he said that wasn't a joke, spills water on her chest, and has her blouse unbuttoned. But when Ben tells her that he gave her the wrong impress
E4
Next
Epilogue to a Kiss
Since Ben has never met Paige's parents, James suggests that he invite them over to the apartment for dinner -- a suggestion which sends Matty's jaw crashing to the floor. Ben has to promise that he won't embarrass him in front of them before Matty grudgingly agrees to it. Ben greets Paige and her parents, Gary and Carolyn Taylor, two very stiff, pretentious doctors. After providing a pseudo-intellectually unstimulating conversation, the Taylors have a conniption when Ben says that Matty and Paige excused themselves to play videogames in Matty's bedroom -- which is verboten in their uptight household. The night goes straight downhill after Ben announces that he saw Matty and Paige kiss. Since Ben wasn't disapproving, and wasn't around when it happened, Gary and Carolyn fly off the handle, break up the budding Romeo and Juliet, tell Ben off, and drag away an unhappy Paige, making an even more unhappy Matty mad at his father. Hoping to patch things up, Ben calls the Taylors later, expect
E5
Boys' Night In
Matty asks Ben if he and Weitzman can catch a train to a Blackhawks game -- in Detroit. The farthest Ben allows him to travel to see it is their living room sofa. Carl tells Ben that he broke up with Jeanette, and claims he's okay about it. But he isn't okay about it, so Ben helps him partake in his favorite post-breakup, pick-me-up activity: poker. Since he told Matty he's responsible enough to do a lot of grown-up things, if not go to Detroit, Ben agrees to let him, and not James, housesit while he goes over to Carl's for their late-night poker game -- which hurts James feelings when he finds out he doesn't get to babysit that night. After grilling him on what to do in emergency situations, Ben leaves, worried that he made a mistake. Carl, Ben, Alex and Nicole are joined by Carl's co-worker, Doug Baker, and the five of them settle in to play a little poker. Even with Ben's mind centered on Matty, he still manages to beat the cards off the others. Until Alex happens to ask Doug what k
E6
Catcher on the Train
Ben's birthday is coming up, and Matty knows just what to get him after Ben spots his favorite author, Samuel Lawrence, sharing a subway car with the Stevensons. Although Samuel wrote the most influential book of Ben's childhood, ""Leaving the City,"" Ben can't bring himself to talk to the elderly writer, since Samuel has quite the reputation for being a recluse. Matty drags Weitzman along to the subway in hopes of running into Samuel again, so he can ask for the man's autograph. Ben is down about his second birthday without Sarah, and doesn't want the gang to throw him a party -- which they do anyway. Matty and Weitzman find Samuel, and Matty asks him to sign Ben's copy of his one and only book. Samuel wants money for the deed, but since the kids don't have enough, he agrees to do it in exchange for Matty's yo-yo. Ben is ecstatic when Matty gives him his gift, but it doesn't end there -- Matty brought home Samuel, as well. The Stevensons share a pizza with the guy, and Carl decides to a
E7
Sofa, So Good
Ben goes to a ritzy furniture store with Alex and Matty to buy a new lamp for Matty, and Ben becomes smitten with the saleslady there, Cheri. After Alex pushes him to ask her out and Matty wanders off, Ben tells Cheri that he's interested in buying a new sofa. It becomes clear that she's interested in him, too, when she offers him her 30% employee discount on an expensive, leather couch he likes. Matty is upset when Ben refuses to let him have a minibike, because they're dangerous, even though Weitzman's parents bought one for his brother, and are now giving it away. Nicole is crushed when she learns that Alex is going to marry his new, 21-year-old girlfriend, Courtney -- but she gets over it quick once Ben tells her that his date is handing out 30% discounts at a store which Nicole loves. So, when Ben and Nicole have their first date at Nicole's, Nicole sucks up by giving them 30% off the meal. It's a disaster, as Ben quickly realizes that Cheri has more balls than he does, and she ne
E8
Eight and a Half Months
It's Halloween, and Ben dresses up like one of the Pips in preparation for a big party he's throwing. A big party to which Alex happened to invite Maya Angelou, who's in town for a book-signing gig. Matty and his new hockey teammates -- who are all two years his senior -- go out to their own party, dressed as a hockey fight. Carl the pirate hits on all the uninterested women at Ben's party, while Nicole the genie fights off the advances of all the men interested in her. Alex and Angela are there, too, as Count Dracula and Xena the Warrior Princess, respectively. Ben never does get to see Maya Angelou (nor do we), but he does get to meet the lovely Kyra Lewis, who's dressed up like a pregnant Madonna. Ben falls head over heels, but his stomach turns flips and somersaults when Kyra goes to the publishing company in normal attire, and he sees the pregnancy thing was no costume. When the soon-to-be-single-mother realizes he didn't know she was eight and a half months along, she apologizes
E9
The Man Called Uncle
Ben begins to feel unneeded when he leaves Matty in Carl's care while he and Alex work overtime filing tax returns, and Matty has more fun with Carl than he ever had with him. And worse, now that Carl pulled a trick to get Matty in to meet Denzel Washington on their outing, Matty doesn't even want to spend time with Ben. Ben worries that he doesn't even know his own son anymore after Paige drops by the apartment with Matty's stuff. They broke up, and Matty didn't tell him. But he did tell Carl. Ben crushes Matty's heart by not allowing him to go with Carl to Funk Fest, because it coincides with his Bugspo field trip, and is angry with Carl for not backing him up. When Matty belabors the issue later, Carl tells him that he couldn't get tickets. Stress over the I.R.S. makes Ben fume at Carl, who storms off after telling Ben that he's crazy. Alex and Nicole help Ben see that he should change his tune, and take Matty to Funk Fest himself, to help console him over the breakup. Ben returns t
E10
Three's Not Company
The Stevensons are visited by Ben's long-time friend, Michael -- who lost a race to him many years ago -- and his young daughter, Pauley. When Matty is reunited with Pauley, he sees how nicely she's developed, and develops a crush on her. They're spending the weekend in Chicago, because one of the country's top ad agencies wants to steal Michael away from his current advertising gig in New York. Ben notices Matty's crush when Michael and Pauley sleep over at their place, and recommends how to make the first move. Michael, who hasn't lost his competitive spirit, challenges Ben to a jog, which wears them both out. Realizing they're too old for competitions, Ben tries to tell his buddy that not everything has to be a contest, to no avail. Weitzman throws a wrench into Matty's designs when he says that he really likes Pauley, and wants him to tell her so. Matty turns to Ben for advice, and Ben says that he's going to have to decide for himself whether Weitzman's friendship means more to hi
E11
To Volunteer Is Human
Carl brags about his new client, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Matty's choir has been selected to go to D.C. to sing at the nationals. They'll need $5000 to go, so the choir parents are planning a big fundraiser -- which used to be Sarah's department. Ben is eager to offer his services as volunteer, but all Matty wants him to do is write a check. At school, Ben meets the treasurer, Sharon Glazier, and chairperson, Candice, and tells them he's volunteering. He also meets Roger, one bitter parent whose wife forced him to volunteer. Ben suggests holding a silent auction, which the others think is a great idea. The committee is looking for a new chairperson, so Ben again volunteers, which they don't think is a great idea. At least not until after he offers to bake cupcakes -- like Sarah used to. Matty is invited to audition for solo, but Alex puts the fear in him that he might not be good enough. So Ben tells him the soloist always gets the girl. The committee come over to the apartment for a meeti
E12
Love Thy Neighbor
Matty starts a 2-week internship at Nicole's, for a school program. While he, Ben, Carl and Alex are out having dinner, they are shocked to see James hanging all over a younger woman. And not just a younger woman, but their neighbor, Mrs. Davis. Although Ben is easygoing about the whole thing, a territorial Carl doesn't want anyone else trying to take their mother's place. When the brothers plan to tell their father that they know, James surprises them by saying that he knows they know; he spotted them spying. Ben asks him to invite Mrs. Davis to Nicole's, so they can get to know each other better. Matty is miffed that the only thing Nicole lets him do is fold napkins. Ben starts to feel more like Carl when he bumps into James fetching the paper at Mrs. Davis' apartment -- in his robe and slippers. Matty gets excited when Nicole lets him pour beverages, so much so that he repeatedly messes up. James brags to Ben that what he thinks he saw is exactly what he saw. Carl changes his tune a
E13
James Stevenson Stands Alone
Matty gets a new--and older--Spanish tutor, Maria, but he's too smitten with her to concentrate on the español. James hears from his doctor that he's got bunions which require surgery. He doesn't want to take time off from his old-fashioned barbershop, so Ben offers his and Carl's services in running the place temporarily. The barbershop is exactly as it was when the two last saw it 30 years ago. Complete with James' crochety, old co-worker, Junior Braush... who hates Carl. After he gets a ""D"" on his Spanish test, Matty isn't content with Ben's suggestion that he find another tutor. While Nicole takes care of a demanding James during his recovery, Matty asks her for advice on how to ask Maria out, as he's not sure if she likes him. Nicole tells him that he can invite her to the restaurant for a grown-up dinner on her. With business at the barbershop nearly dead, Ben advises James that he should think about closing shop, as he's barely breaking even (no thanks to SpeedyCuts opening up a
E14
Carpe Diem
Matty braces himself for a Sadie Hawkins Day dance by dodging the calls of the many interested girls who aren't named Diane. Carl finds romance of his own courtesy a woman who rents videos from the same store he does. And Ben makes it a trifecta by lighting up to a younger woman, Allison, who pitched a media plan to him. She beats him to the punch by asking him out. Matty's spirits sink when Ben tells him Diane called to ask him to the dance, only to pick up and hear that it's not Diane, but Diana, whom he's now stuck having to take. Ben eagerly awaits going to Allison's place for the first time -- only to get there and find her daddy, Jack, with her, waiting to grill his daughter's date. When Ben tries to explain the age thing and that he's just dating for fun, he only succeeds in putting his foot in his mouth. But once Jack's out of the picture, their first date is smooth sailing. So smooth, in fact, that when it comes time to end, she asks him to take her to a nightclub. Since that'
E15
Per Chance to Dance
Ben is nervous about an upcoming television appearance on ""Book Chat."" His anxiety leads to a recurring dream where he's about to get on an elevator, and a group of tap dancers surround him, show off their stuff, and ask him to join in, only for him to say that he can't. Ben figures the dreams will end once the appearance is over and done with, and repeatedly turns down Alex's offers to join him on vacation in the Caribbean to clear his mind and scope out hot babes, using Matty's basketball game as one of many excuses why he can't go. Ben knocks 'em dead on ""Book Chat,"" and brags like there's no tomorrow to Carl and Alex, who both assume they'll never have to hear about his dream again. Matty sprains his ankle, forcing him to have to sit out sports for a few weeks. So he tells Ben he should go with Carl to the Caribbean. But even with one excuse out of the way, Ben still refuses to go -- and the dreams continue. Wondering why they won't stop now that the TV gig is in the bag, Ben reali
E16
Wahunthra
Ben becomes awestruck after a manuscript falls into his lap about a fearless Masai Princess called Wahunthra. At Nicole's, he and Alex meet with its beautiful, unpublished author, Toni, and her much more talkative, plus-sized agent, Joyce. Ben's fascination turns to disappointment, as he had felt a strong connection with Toni through her writing, only to see she's nowhere near as communicative in person. But the dinner isn't a total wash, since there's chemistry between him and Joyce. They'll be having a lot of time to get to know each other better, since she visits the Home Court Press to say she's giving them the book rights. When she gets defensive after Ben says that he wants to meet with Toni again to discuss making edits, he realizes that ""Joyce"" lied to him - she is Toni. After he calls her on it, she admits she hired someone to play her, because she felt she didn't embody the beauty that is Wahunthra. He quickly wins her over by telling her that she does. But later on in privat
E17
Get Smarter
Matty joins a study group, and begs Ben for some money to attend a lecture. When Ben presses him for more info, Matty confesses that it's a mostly-girls study group, and one of those girls just so happens to be Christy Putnam, a girl he's had his eye on for a long time. To help him score points with the smart crowd, Ben recommends that he invite the whole group over to the apartment to study. After ""smartening"" the place up, the kids -- Christy, Amber and Harrison, the token Asian -- arrive. But when his buddies actually study, Matty finds himself way out of his brain league. Meanwhile, Alex deals with his own romantic troubles in the wake of his girlfriend, Courtney, dumping him. Since he won't stop moping around, Ben, Carl and Nicole all decide to cheer him up and help him forget about her by inviting him to watch a PPV boxing match with them at Ben's place. During the game, Alex won't stop talking about the one that got away, so it's a big relief to the others when he up and leaves
E18
Anita the Hun
Matty gets in trouble at school, making Ben have to come down and talk with his tough English teacher, Anita Hunsley -- or, as the kids affectionately call her behind her back, Anita the Hun. As it turns out, Ben and Anita knew each other from way back when as camp counselors, before Anita got married and assumed a different surname, a surname she kept after her divorce. While Matty is forced to brush up on his Shakespeare, Ben hits him with a surprise -- he's invited Anita over to the apartment to catch up on old times. That's something that James thinks isn't a good idea, since Ben wanted Anita when they were teens. Anita manages to win Matty over when he finds out she's a hockey fan, too. In private, Ben confesses to Anita his teenage crush on her, and is excited to hear that she had one on him. But before anything happens, they both call it a night, realizing Matty's father shouldn't be dating Matty's teacher. Hartek bullies Matty at school after he finds out that he not only got a
E19
Sister-in-Law, Sister-in-Law
Ben gets a surprise visit from his baby sister-in-law, Julia Bullock. She's a drifter slash swindler who owed him $1000, and skipped town without paying him back. The first thing she gives him upon their reunion is a check for the amount of the loan, and the second is an apology for her irresponsibility, claiming she wants to be more responsible from now on, especially now that he's widowed. Hoping to let bygones be bygones (and make sure her check actually clears), Ben offers to let her stay with the family temporarily, and she accepts. Since she plans to look for a job while she's in Chicago, Ben offers her a temping gig at the Home Court Press, as their new temp, Dolores, is so scary that both he and Alex want to fire her... if they can actually figure out how. Julia announces that she's found herself an apartment, and she's going to sell her car to afford it. Because she needs it for work, Ben gives her her check back for the time being. He's shocked to come home and find that she
E20
Mug the One You're With
Ben takes out a mugger to protect Matty, making him a hero in his son's eyes, and an object of envy in Carl's. Ben just wants to put the incident behind him, but he doesn't get his wish after Matty brags about it in school, his class goes to the publishing company for career day, and all they want to talk about is how Ben beat up a bad guy. Ben and Carl go to Nicole's for dinner, where Nicole plans to give Ben a surprise party for his heroics, but she's forced to cancel the celebration when he tells her that, despite his write-up in the paper, he doesn't want to be thought of as a hero. The festivities are ruined, anyway, when he gets served a summons -- the mugger is suing him for using excessive force, rendering him ""unable to work."" Operating as Ben's attorney, Carl plans to file a countersuit over the mugger, Francis Shelton's, frivilous lawsuit, but Ben the peacemaker asks that he not, so as to get the matter settled quickly. Acting on behalf of Francis is Gloria Newberry, the uns
E21
Ben-Her
When Ben turns down an offer to spend the night at Kyra's place after walking her home, he wonders if there's something wrong with him. Nicole consoles him by saying that he might not be ready so soon after Sarah's death. Meanwhile, Matty brags to a skeptical Ben that he's found a way to see two girls at the same time without either one knowing about the other. When Kyra walks Ben home on their next date, he tries to kiss her and invite her in, but she finds ways to dodge both advances. Unsure if she rejected his offer to get even with him for rejecting hers or if she just isn't interested, he turns to Alex for advice. Kyra drops by Ben's place of work to explain why she couldn't come in. To prove she likes him, they do it. In the office. Yet, after his big break, Kyra starts cancelling every date he's made with her in quick succession. Matty's double-dating fantasy starts to unravel when the schedules of his two girls conflict with one another, and Ben worries that he was so bad in th
E22
I'll See You All in Health
After a heart attack scare with James, Ben recommends that he start taking better care of himself. But when Carl reminds him that it's been five years since he's been to a doctor, Ben decides to set a good example for his father, and see the physician who works with Carl's girlfriend, Naomi, to prove that he's the picture of good health. Instead of seeing that male doctor, Ben is shocked to see Naomi herself, since the guy Carl recommended is in London. After nervously going ahead with the check-up, Ben gets his test results, and learns that his cholesterol level is dangerously high. Suddenly health-conscious, he changes his (and everyone else's) diet, and makes Carl keep him company at the gym. Carl is the first to throw in the towel in the support department, and James and Matty quickly follow suit by ordering a pizza -- which they hide from Ben. The pizza ends up giving James heartburn, so he's forced to come clean when a fearful Ben drags him back to the hospital, believing he's re